Empowerment – Life Coaching Tips – How to Eliminate Fear from Your Life
As a life coach, my job is to support my clients in getting inspired and empowered to take action on their most cherished dreams. Fear gets in the way.
You know what you want. In fact, most of the time, you even know what to do to get what you want, but you get stopped by fear, doubt and uncertainty. These are emotions that tell you that you’re listening to your mind, or you’re allowing your mind to control your life. Your mind, which I call the “Drunk Monkey,” is nothing more than a survival tool. It’s a fantastic device that has developed over time for human beings. Its job is to steer us away from danger. Its job is to steer us toward propagating the species, and to keep us safe from danger, and that’s about it.
No goals and dreams are achieved via the mind. Goals and dreams are achieved via inspiration. How do you get the inspiration, when what you want seems so big? Does what you want seem too unattainable? Maybe you feel like you’re not enough or you don’t know what to do. You have to begin with the empowerment process.
The empowerment process begins with the word “aware”. There are four inspirational words in sum: awareness, flexibility, options, and power. Let’s take them one at a time.
With awareness, you start to see that your mind is not your friend. You begin to see that the “Drunk Monkey” in your head is really focused in on what isn’t working, what you don’t like, or what might hurt you. It has thoughts like “I’ll be embarrassed” or “I won’t look good” or “I won’t be enough” or “I’ll feel stupid. I’ll feel like an idiot” or “my family will leave me”. These are the kinds of thoughts that the Drunk Monkey in your head is going to spin for you, when you ask it to do things you don’t normal do.
Your goals and dreams are things you don’t normal do, expansion, where you want to go. With awareness, you can start to see that your mind is not on your side. It’s not helping you achieve your goals. It’s just this biology. It’s operating independently of you and it’s doing what it’s doing. That awareness will lead to the second part of the empowerment process, which is flexibility.
Once you are aware that your mind is running the show, that you are literally the Drunk Monkey’s puppet, you can begin to make choices. This flexibility that you have now, leads to the third part of the process, which is options.
As soon as you recognize that your mind is running the show, that the Drunk Monkey is holding the puppet strings of your life and pulling those puppet strings with fear, anxiety, doubt, uncertainty, anger, frustration, as soon as you realize that, a new set of options opens up. Well, what if I took the action? What if I went this direction instead? How about if I ask for help? On and on you go, with all these new options popping into your head that weren’t there before. Once you realize that your mind is not a goal achievement vehicle or a goal achievement organ, as so many personal developments gurus have espoused in the past, this leads to number four, which is power.
When you’re aware of what your mind is doing, you become more flexible. When you are flexible, you see more options. You have options in your life. Those options empower you to take new actions. This action is what I call inspired action. You become inspired and empowered to take action on your dreams. You experience an energy inside of you, pulling you forward, and having you actually feel confident when before you felt fear.
Author: Matthew Ferry